Effective comm's tip

How to manage anxiety and stress in communication

Bram Smets · 9 October 2026

A racing heart before an interview or a debate is normal. You don't need to make the nerves go away. You need tools that keep them from taking over, both in the moment and at the source.

The starting point is a mindset shift: an interview is not a performance with one right way to do it. It's a conversation.

The BMW principle: body, mind, words

Stress shows up in three places. Work on all three.

Body. Breathe out twice as long as you breathe in. Stand firm and use gestures.
Mind. Focus on your audience, not on yourself. You're there to give, not to get.
Words. Be clear, avoid filler words, and let a silence sit.

Quick fixes for physical symptoms

When the nerves hit your body, each symptom has a fix:

Symptom	What helps
Racing heart, speaking too fast	Deep belly breathing, with the exhale twice as long as the inhale. It activates your body's calming response and slows your heart rate.
Shaking hands, trembling	Big, broad gestures or moving around beforehand give the adrenaline somewhere to go. During the interview, squeezing your hands or toes has the same effect.
Blushing, sweating	Hold a cold bottle of water in your palms. Cooling your hands helps you feel cooler and calmer.
Dry mouth	Chew gum or a mint, have a hot drink beforehand, and sip water just before you start.
Mind goes blank	Repeat your last statement, or go back to your headline.

Seven sources of stress, and how to defuse them

Quick fixes treat symptoms. To feel less stressed in the first place, deal with where the stress comes from.

Source	What to do
Worrying about what might go wrong	Anxiety is about the future, so pull yourself into the present. Walk around, shake hands, listen to music, count backwards from 100 in steps of 17, or say a tongue twister.
Feeling judged	Reframe the interview from a performance into a conversation. A performance has a "right way". A conversation doesn't.
Perfectionism	Dare to be dull: aim for clear and adequate, not perfect. Connection beats perfection.
Focusing on yourself	Turn the spotlight around. You're there to serve the people listening, not to be admired by them.
Fear of blanking out	Prepare a structure, not a script.
Fighting the nerves	Greet your anxiety ("It's OK to be nervous") and name it from the outside ("This is me feeling nervous"). Your body reacts the same way to excitement as to fear, so call it excitement.
The first minute	Ask what the first question will be and prepare your answer in your head.

In the long run: build tolerance

The nerves don't vanish after one good interview, but they do shrink with practice. Build tolerance through repetition, reflection and feedback. Do interviews often, look back at what worked, and ask a colleague for honest notes.

Each time, the racing heart becomes a little more familiar, and a little less of a threat.

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